You’ve most likely heard the high-profile stories of Phoebe Prince or Tyler Clementi who ended their lives after being bullied, and many more of you have heard of at least one person in your local area who has talked about, or committed suicide. “This growing problem is a stem of social media, where kids never sleep and lies spin into storms that rage on throughout the night and into next day’s light”, reports Dr. Tyler Damon.
It started when a got a tip for an important project coming up, one that could make the difference of getting my own office or staying in my cube for another year. It is custom for the senior executives to meet with the client, and then later that same day in a board room meeting choose the team that will be working with that new client. Of course there are the office favorites but I knew if I kept my head up, volunteered for the projects nobody wanted and shined I would get noticed, and noticed I have but I’m not sure for all the right reasons?
Shari Carsmet says that when she was in high school the girls would say mean things to her as she walked down the hall and if it was before lunch they would continue the taunting into the lunch room. She finally stopped eating lunch all together and hid in the bathroom. Luckily she had some amazing teachers who put a stop to the harassment; “but when teachers step in it does not always make things better”; Shari says.
My girlfriend likes the fact that she can let her “hair down”, be wild and crazy without the spying eyes of a camera hidden somewhere that might capture her letting lose. “Everyone needs some crazy time, some time to blow off steam from the office”, she tells me just as she orders her third Dixie Car Bomb. This I agree with, if we didn’t have a chance to let ourselves relax we would be so wound up-we’d crack, and you know you’ve seen these people, they are the ones with the guns who come back and shoot everyone because they have had enough.
Lies and words do hurt, and this is how it began with a fake Face book profile; everyone was sent an email letting us know that our company had a Facebook , account and would everyone please join so that we could be added to our teams events. This seems reasonable as we do communications and social marketing is one more great way to keep in touch with clients. However it also created a living hell for me as a wall of lies sprang up which seemed to be targeting me. At first I had know idea I was being attacked, stories were posted, events listed, accomplishments cheered on, and just a lot of chatter- I mean who has time to look at every teams postings, but then one of my co-workers pointed out that my picture and a list of accomplishments were posted by someone where the facts were twisted just enough to make me look like an incompetent slug at the office.
Due to the site being available to every employee it made for a well covered tracks and then a few weeks later the personal attacks started where I was being called the office slut and posted were pictures of me with guys by the coffee machine- I mean really so juvenile, but it bothered me so I went to my supervisor to complain, we looked some of my complaints and she just laughed- “All in fun, your taking this to seriously”; she made the comment to lighten up or everyone will take it as truth; so for the next several months I tried to ignore it. Then one day, this guy who I didn’t know very well met with senior management unbeknownst to me and I was called in into their offices. They didn’t know this was happening and actually have a policy against “cyber bullying” which is what they considered this to be and right then and there got to the bottom of who was doing this. I was in shock that someone unfamiliar with me would watch my back; it also rocked my world when later the police used a search warrant to link the Facebook page to my supervisor.
The bully wasn’t my friend, or co-worker but someone with authority that should have had my back as my supervisor, instead I guess she could see my work was surpassing hers, or maybe jealous of my office relationships? Really I never did understand what her motivation was but I have to say it really shook me up. I’ve since left that company because it never felt the same to work there, but I’ll be forever grateful that someone took a stand and said something in my behalf.
Too many people today are considering suicide as the easy way out because they think they are the only ones being harassed, and they feel isolated, confused, and hurt. We need to bust this topic out in the open and let people know it is not ok to be harassed or bullied, and should you be a victim you need to tell people because you are not alone and there are people out there who love you and want you to live. If you know someone or are a victim yourself you need to stand up and be heard- make a difference, it could save someone’s life.
Everyone at the office may agree times are getting tougher; So what is a person supposed to do? At Social Service Coordinators they are the leading health advocates in the nation why not check them out and get a list of free services for you and your family.